I Hate It When...

... everyone that looks in your truck as they walk by has to stop in awe and comment, "Wow. Your truck is empty."*

Yeah. I know it's empty. It's called "getting peeled on days that ends with a 'y'."

Thanks.



* or "Hey, where did all your lights go? Hahaha." I'm sure I'd find that joke** to be funnier if we didn't just use every light we had while being ridiculously understaffed.


** Here's an oldie but a goodie:
"Our Gaffer's an 'available light' kind of guy."
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. He uses every available light we have!"

"If Men Were Treated Like Women In Hollywood."

While I can't vouch for how accurate or exaggerated any of the other parts of this video are (although it I had to guess, I doubt it'd be far from the truth), if you change the part where they say "P.A." to "electrician," I can honestly say those scenes hold truth*. Very much truth.

I've even had this scenario happen to me. Almost word for word. And more than once.

If the "on the set" scenes are so eerily accurate, how realistic do you think the other scenes are?







* And by that, I mean if the roles were reversed. I mean if I was in the guy in the video's place like I am in real life. ...you know what I mean.

Lesson For The Day...

This is NOT a secure way to strap down a cart in the truck.

You Know You Should Stop Hitting The Snooze Button When...

... the mocking bird outside your window starts imitating your alarm clock.

My Days Off.

I'd have so much fun with these...

2015 started with me finishing up a show, finishing up another one, and then working on a string of pilots that somehow (more or less) seamlessly flowed from one to another.

And then a funny thing happened: the shows all ended.

WTF? Anyone who reads my blog on a semi-regular basis knows I'm usually going from one thing straight on to another.

Even more odd, the next thing I had lined up didn't start for at least another two weeks, which means that for the first time in what seems like forever, I have some real time off.

Sure, I've had occasional days off in the past couple of years, but only a day or two here and there and usually just long enough to take care of some business, like finally having that weird noise in my car checked out, and maybe meet up with a friend for lunch.

But two whole weeks before I get another callsheet seems unheard of.

I spent the first week finally tackling the mess that is my apartment, sorting through the clutter and stacks of mail that inevitably pile up when I'm working. I even cleaned out my closet and finally got the door to shut! The place still isn't what I'd like it to be, but it's an improvement and good enough for now.

I decided my second week of off time should be dedicated to me.

I met up with friends, went to museums, ate at new restaurants, ate at old restaurants, got a massage, sat outside and read a book trashy magazine, and bought something silly for myself.

But oddly enough, the thing I was most excited about doing? Growing out my nails and painting them.

It may sound weird and kinda gross, but having longish (not super long, but long enough to make a "clackity-clack" sound when tapped on a table), brightly colored nails is a luxury for me. Throwing around 4/0, wiring practicals and moving lights around all day makes having short nails a necessity, despite wearing gloves. Anything longer than cut down to the nail bed is just asking to be broken, split, or torn. And nail polish, no matter what it says on the bottle, WILL ALWAYS CHIP THE FIRST DAY. (Nail polish manufaturers, if you're reading this, feel free to send me your best "anti-chip"/"tough-as-nails" polish and I'll prove to you that it won't last a day in my world.) Not to mention all the gross gunk and grime that gets caught underneath. Ew.

For me, having "girly" nails is just one of those little things you can't have when you work on this side of the industry and I reveled in having them, even if it was just for a week.

Which makes me wonder what other simple pleasures do other people indulge in once they finally get some time off? Wear flip-flops everywhere instead of work boots? Spend hours in the kitchen cooking a great meal? Bust out the margarita pool?



Previously.

"We Mourn, We Remember, And We Will Never Stop Fighting."

April 28th is Worker's Memorial Day here in the U.S. (and Canada's Day of Mourning).

The IATSE is trying to organize a moment of silence at 1pm (EST)/ 10am (PST).

You don't have to be a union member to participate. Or be in the industry. Or even have a job. Workplace safety is something that affects everyone no matter who/where they are and I think it's something we often take for granted.

To read more about it, go here. And here. And here.

I know it's kind of late notice, but please participate if you can.



Bonus points: Google this Bad-Ass Mother!

Producer Logic.

For those of you unfamiliar with the term, "Producer Logic" is often the answer to why some things seem totally stupid and ass backwards.

Some examples...

- Production denies your request for more manpower for the day because they don't want to spend the money. So instead, the set ups take even longer because you're shorthanded, and therefore, cost production even more.

- Production doesn't want to pay for a rigging and wrap crew, so they have to pay the entire shooting crew to do it along with giving everyone meal penalties for their pre-call and late wrap... While in double time. Oh, and a forced call penalty if they don't finish before their turnaround time.

- Production cuts down your equipment list due to budget, but then spends more on manpower and time as your crew leap-frogs lights around from set to set.

- Production doesn't want to pay the extra money for leveling blocks for the condor, rendering the condor they paid for useless since we now can't use it because (surprise!) it's not level.

- Production spends its money paying for big name actors and DPs, but doesn't have any money left over for crew and amenities to support those people.

- Production wants to use a location because it's "free," but has to deal with time restrictions, sound issues, it takes transpo over an hour to move the trailers over, etc and has to fix a bunch of shit in post and/or do re-shoots.

- Production skimps on the caterer in the beginning but then has to splurge on a really good caterer when everyone complains about the food... Including their bosses. (Hint: If you had just gotten a decent caterer to begin with, you wouldn't have had to splurge on the really good one later.)

- Production doesn't want to buy a $400 putt-putt because it's "too expensive." Instead, you add it to the equipment rental where they're paying $85/week for it... for six weeks.

- Production wants zero L&D but then only gives you one day to load a truck by yourself, undercuts your man power for the whole show, rushes you through wrap to avoid paying overtime, and then wonder why things get lost and broken... All while paying you a little more than minimum wage.


Sigh...